I am sitting here today, on the 28th day of June 2021, at the age of 59, in our new fancy apartment in Brighton.
(It’s far too fancy to be called a flat btw, it’s pretty much the perfect penthouse I always imagined living in when I was older, except it’s not on the top floor, but on the penultimate floor in this block.)
Not older, yet, either. Well, certainly not as old as I’d envisaged I’d have to be, to live in an apartment like this. Brand new, still sparkling clean, full of brand new furniture, right next to the North Laines, with a lift. I can hear the Speigle Tent of the Brighton Fringe for heaven’s sake, you can’t get much more central.
I can even have a little dog if I want to and in my daydream, there was always a little dog. I am not going to get a little dog yet, far too much responsibility, but I could if I want to. It says so in the lease.
“As long as you’re still alive, you always have the chance to start again.”
― No Longer Broken
There’s an amazing and unexpected bonus which is that my daughter Phoebe is here too. Now that’s something I never imagined, thinking that when I was old enough for this apartment, she’d be off having her own family. She’s not quite there at that stage of her life yet, it all having happened much suddenly and earlier than anticipated, so here she is. Living with her old ma, issuing strict instructions about how I am not to behave like a Ma, ever, at all.
If you look back, you’ll see my last blog post was written around the 12th of March 2020, when we thought a pandemic was on the way. I was washing up and trying to be mindful, keeping panic under control. Being an avid dystopian sci-fi reader that was easier said than done. I wonder if I had ordered the three months’ worth of pasta and couscous, tinned tuna and tomatoes, stock cubes, red lentils, and Encona Hot Pepper sauce from Tesco by then. I must have done.
Once I finished washing up, I wrote the blog post remembering Steve, who died five (and a bit!) years ago now. He’d have loved this apartment, being very fond of brand new places with brand new furniture. He probably wouldn’t have lived here with me, not being that keen on Brighton, although he may have changed his mind on that by now. No, my life has taken some strange twists and turns since he died and it probably wouldn’t have unraveled that way if he was still around.
Now all the flatpack has been assembled by Phoebe’s obliging boyfriend, all our existing boxes are unpacked, recycling taken to the Bin Room in Block A, I’m starting to run out of things to do.
I’m wondering ‘So what next?’. What’s next for me, in life? That’s the burning question I now wake up to every day, go to sleep to, and have ringing in my head for most of the day.
As getting your thoughts out of your head is a great way to move forward, here I am blogging again. I’m going to model myself on one of my first business mentors Chris Barrow, Dental Business Coach, he blogs daily and keeps it short. I want to blog daily and keep it short. However, I’m not known for my brevity, once I get going.
Keep it daily, short, simple, with one picture. I’ll share that on social media and to my mailing list. See what happens, if anything.
It will give me a structure to the day. Make me feel that I’m achieving something every day.
Just keep going.
“When your world is completely flattened, you have no choice but to start over from the ground up. It can take over a decade. Anyone that watched from afar would call this a tragic catastrophe. I now know one of life’s greatest secrets; destruction breeds growth.” ―
Well nicola. It sounds familiar. Having ‘retired’ from corporate life, I am now enjoying doing some work to give the focus that you refer to. Big difference is I have finally understood just how good I am and can only say that ‘because I can’. Its the ‘because I can’ rather than the ‘I should ‘ that makes it enjoyable . The icing on the cake for me is I have finally found a hobby in my new motorhome. Also giving focus and purpose 🙂
Oooh, a Motorhome, I am rather jealous! Yes, that would work. I’ve been watching a lot of woodsman/survival videos on YouTube but am not sure if I’ll ever pluck up the courage to go on one of their weekends! Good for you though, it’s hard to come out of corporate and start again! Thanks for reading, Nicola x
Good to see you happy as you begin your next adventure Nicola. Andy and I were talking about you the other day (all good of course) 😉
For me it was leaving the UK for Cyprus and then (for the last eight years) living here on Magnetic Island. Lovely where life leads you sometimes ey?
Hi Roy! I think the last time I saw you was over margaritas on the Internet Marketers Cruise? When I was discovering slowly and painfully that lots of salty cocktails do not help jet lag feet swelling? How are you and where is Magnetic Island – sounds great! Is it on the equator? Cheers, Nicola
Hi Nicola
Never been on the Marketers cruise actually, as I get sea sick on a duck pond! 😉
Maybe you really had been having too many margaritas! LOL. 🙂
I think it was likely at somewhere we both may have been speaking. World Internet Summit maybe?
Magnetic Island is gorgeous, yes. It’s in the Coral Sea, (Part of the South Pacific), Queensland, Australia. You’re welcome to pop over for drinks when the madness ends 😉
I will take you up on that next time I’m down under! If anyone ever gets to travel again. You guys have got it worst of all, by all accounts.
Travelling can be an issue if you want o go outside Australia (or come back in), but we can still go for walks on unpopulated beaches here and can travel within Queensland, which is lovely and huge anyway. So not too bad.